HOW TO SLEEP TRAIN: BABY SLEEP TRAINING TIPS & TRICKS (DUPLICATED)
ORIGINALLY POSTED: 25 May 2022
After a long day of parenting, you then have to go through the bedtime routine: bath, lotion, pajamas, and rocking your newborn to sleep. But then, they are up two or three hours later, and you’re back in the rocking chair to soothe them to sleep. This can even sometimes occur multiple times a night which leaves for exhausted parents the next day! After weeks or months of this cycle, you’re bound to be worn down.
As their little one starts to get older, some parents begin to wonder how they can help their newborn fall asleep more easily or at least on their own. This is when sleep training, or sleep teaching as it's sometimes called, comes into play.
For some, “sleep training” sounds scary. It doesn’t have to be that way. Sleep training can be a smooth process for babies and parents that leads to healthier sleep for all.
To help a baby fall asleep, sleep training is a great tool. Keep reading for more baby sleep tips, and the answer to your most pressing questions like “how to start sleep training?”
What is baby sleep training?
Let’s start with the basics of what baby sleep training is and what it isn’t. At its core, sleep training is the process of helping your little one to go to sleep and stay asleep independently. This means your baby is able to be laid down in their cot or bassinet awake and fall asleep on their own without your aid (such as rocking, nursing, or bottle feeding to sleep).
It’s important to remember that sleep training is not just when you help your infant fall asleep but when they learn to put themselves back to sleep during the night. After all, night waking is a normal part of the sleep cycle for everyone, including adults. Sleep training helps babies learn how to deal with this.
On the other hand, sleep training is not night weaning, which is the process of getting a baby to stop breast or bottle feeding during the night. Just because you decide to sleep train your baby does not mean you need to wean at night. Depending on your baby’s age, you can still feed them once or twice at night. You’ll want to consult your pediatrician before making the final decision to cut out night feeds.
How to start sleep training?
Once you’ve decided that you’re ready to make the leap and help your infant fall asleep on their own, there is not much preparation to do except for making sure your baby is the right age and selecting a specific method to follow.
As for when to start sleep training, the general consensus from pediatricians and baby sleep experts is that 4-6 months old is the perfect time. At this age, your little one is physically able to make it 6-8 hours at night without needing to eat, and at the same time, they’re young enough to have not fully formed sleep associations. However, no one knows your baby better than you do! Your little one might be ready at 3 months or not ready till closer to 7 months.
A sleep association is a cue or behavior that your little one associates strongly with sleeping that they can't fall asleep without it. It’s common for babies to develop sleep associations with behaviors such as rocking or nursing, but it can also be objects such as pacifiers. It can make sleep training slightly more difficult, but not impossible, if your little one has fully developed sleep associations.
Different baby sleep training methods
The next step in the “how to start sleep training” process is to choose the method that will work best for you and your family. Baby sleep training is not a “one-size-fits-all” process. Some families choose one or use a mix of the following:
1. Cry it out (CIO): This is the method most people associate with sleep training. Also known as the “extinction” method, CIO involves putting your little one to bed after completing your bedtime routine while they are still awake. If they cry or fuss, parents let them do so without interfering or providing comfort until the baby falls asleep (or back to sleep). Essentially, this means you need to put your little one to bed with a full belly in a safe sleep environment and then not pick them back up until the morning or until the next feeding time. You will need to stay out of their room while they cry as well.
For some parents, listening to their little one cry without intervening is very difficult which is why the CIO method can be controversial. But many agree that “crying it out” is much harder on parents than it is on babies. Consistency with this method is critical, and with consistency, parents typically start to see their baby fall asleep unassisted and without tears within three to four (give or take).
2. Ferber method: For parents who are not comfortable with letting their baby cry without any comfort, the Ferber method might be the right baby sleep training method. It is also referred to as “check and console”, “graduated extinction”, “progressive waiting”, and “the interval method.”
While there are variations to this approach, the general principle is that parents put their little one to bed awake and if they start to fuss or cry, the parent checks on their little one after timed intervals. Checking on the baby does not mean picking the infant up to rock or feed them but does involve rubbing their back or whispering soothingly to them. It provides comfort while still forcing them to fall asleep on their own.
A key component of the Ferber method is that the timed intervals of crying get longer by a few minutes everytime. For example, at first, the parent goes in after two minutes of crying. After providing comfort and leaving, they would wait three or four minutes before going in again. With consistency, this method helps little ones learn to settle down on their own without the frequent check in from the parent.
3. Chair method: This method might take longer to fully take effect but is an option for parents who would prefer to be physically present in the child’s room. With the chair method, you still put the baby down in their cot fully awake but instead of leaving the room, you sit in a chair by their cot and stay there until they fall asleep. If you get up to leave and they wake up, sit up back down until they fall asleep again. Every few nights, move the chair closer and closer to the door until it is out of the room.
However, it’s important to note that this method won’t be effective for babies who can’t put you out of mind as long as you are in sight. If that is the case, the cry-it-out or Ferber method might be more effective.
4. Bedtime fading method: This approach to baby sleep training deals with attempting to modify your little one’s circadian rhythm to get bedtime to where you need it to be. This is more useful for babies who wail for extended periods of time before crashing and going to sleep. They might be signalling to you that their body is not ready for sleep yet. Using the bedtime fading methods helps everyone–parents, baby, and baby’s rhythms–get on the same schedule.
The process is simple. First, you need to make sure to pay attention to your baby’s sleep cues (eye rubbing, yawning, fussiness, etc). Once these cues have become evident, put your little one to bed. The hope is that because they are tired, they will fall asleep quickly. If that is not the case and there is a lot of crying, take your little one out of the cot for a certain amount of time (such as 30 minutes) before trying again.
The next night, put your little one to bed at the time they finally fell asleep the night before. You can use this as the new bedtime, or you can try to put your little one down 15 minutes earlier each night to get to the desired time.
Each method is different, and you have to find the one or combination that works best for your family. Whatever you choose, remember to stick to that approach consistently to achieve the best results.
What about baby sleep training for naps?
Whenever you decide to start sleep training, it’s best to go all in and try the method at every opportunity. This means applying the same method or strategy to daytime naps as you do at night.
With methods like CIO or Ferber, you do want to keep in mind that 30 minutes of crying might take up a good portion of the nap. Some parents find it helpful to set a time limit on crying (such as 10 or 12 minutes) before intervening to help their little one get to sleep. Making sure your little one still gets the age-appropriate amount of sleep during the day can be critical in helping them fall asleep at night. Babies who slept too much or too little during the day sometimes struggle to fall asleep at night which can make sleep training challenging.
Keeping that in mind, it is recommended to attempt sleep training during naps but to prioritize your sleep training method for nighttime. If it does not work for a nap, do not worry about helping your little one fall asleep. Once they have been sleeping independently mastered at night, it will eventually translate to their daytime sleep as well.
How long does sleep training take?
Remember, sleep training is not a “one size fits all” process. Some babies struggle a lot while others pick it up right away. It all depends on the method you choose, your baby’s age, and your consistency to the process.
For example, many parents who consistently follow the Ferber or cry it out approach find that their babies are able to put themselves to sleep within three to four nights without tears. Some it might take a little longer and for others it might take a little less. Some of the other training methods, on the other hand, are known for taking longer to stick. The chair method and bedtime fading method can take two to three weeks (maybe more) to be fully effective, and for some babies, it may not work at all.
Baby sleep training tips
Here are some sleep training tips to help make the transition smoother no matter which method you family is using:
- Follow a bedtime routine. Having an established bedtime routine will help you and your little stay consistent! Start winding down for bed at least 30-45 minutes prior to bedtime. If you’re trying to break your little one of falling asleep at the breast or bottle, do those activities earlier in the routine. A typical bedtime routine might include bathtime, special toys, books, pyjamas, and a little cuddling before being placed in the cot.
- Get the timing right. Choose wisely when to start sleep training. When there are major changes happening, it might not be the best time to start sleep training. This includes moving houses, taking a big trip, or starting/switching childcare providers. You want everything else to be stable before trying to change your baby’s sleep habits.
- Learn baby's sleep cues. To help the baby fall asleep, you’ll want to know when they’re tired! It makes things a lot easier for everyone. Everyone’s child is a little different but the most common tired cues from babies include rubbing eyes, yawning, turning away from lights/sounds, and fussiness. Look for these and use them to help you find the best time to lay your baby in their cot still awake but tired.
- Always put the baby down awake. Remember, that consistency with sleep training is key! So, you always want to put your little one down for bed when they are awake. As tempting as it might be from time to time to rock them to sleep, your baby will not learn to sleep on their own otherwise.
Sleep training for babies at different ages
When it comes to babies under a year old, the traditional sleep training methods seem to work regardless of age. Early on especially, there is not a big difference between sleep training a 3 month old compared to sleep training a 4 month old. Some experts believe 3 months old is slightly too young to sleep train, but you know your baby best.
The ages 4-6 month is often referred to as a “sweet spot” for sleep training. Babies have developed the physical ability to go for longer stretches without food, and they are still too little to have developed strong sleep associations such as rocking or nursing to sleep.
Even with older babies, sleep training is still possible. So if you find yourself with a 10 month old, don’t worry–you can still do it! It might just take a little longer and require significant discipline on your part.
How to get baby to sleep without swaddle
If you’re one of the many parents who make swaddling part of their bedtime routine, then you might be wondering if you will need to retrain your little one to fall asleep independently after their swaddling days are done. Especially if your baby won’t sleep without the swaddle.
When it’s time to transition from the swaddle, many parents are left wondering how to put their baby to sleep without a swaddle. The truth is that getting baby to sleep without swaddle can be challenging at first, but as with most things in sleep training, consistency will be critical for success.
Here are some tips to help with the process:
- Don't start sleep training and transitioning from the swaddle at the same time.
- Swaddle with one arm or both arms out.
- Start using a sleeping bag to help with the transition
In the end, sleep training can be one of the best decisions for your family! It can help you and your baby get the quality sleep at night you need to be at your best.